Should i respond to the silent treatment

To get there, you might have to allow more time to pass than you think feels normal, but it will be worth it when they come back around to their usual bubbly self. But remember that the quickest way to get them to regress again is to play the blame game. Fitzpatrick suggests coming up with a timetable of sorts for arguments that reach this level in order for both of you to have a bit of what you need—them, time; you, structure.

This is also OK, as neither of you should be forced into a dialogue that you might not be ready for. This might feel a little strange at first, but looking each other in the eye is an intimate action that—in itself—could defuse the tension. A strong relationship—like yours—is built to withstand tiffs, disagreements and, yes, even the silent treatment.

This Will Be the Amazon Coat of Does Hand Sanitizer Work? We Ask Hamptons Chicago San Francisco. Connect With Us. Are you sure you want to remove this item from your Recipe Box?

Create a Password Forgot your password? Enter your registered email below! To Save to My Recipe Box. Log In Never created a password? You are not currently subscribed. It appears your Facebook email address is not subscribed to PureWow. Please indicate how you like to proceed:. Ask the other person to share their feelings.

This lets them know that their feelings are important and valid, and it paves the way for an open conversation. Avoid becoming defensive or going into problem-solving mode. Try to stay present and listen empathically. If the person responds in a threatening or abusive way, it is important to remove oneself from the situation until they calm down. Talk to a doctor, therapist, or trusted friend for help.

Sometimes, a person may give someone the silent treatment because they are too angry, hurt, or overwhelmed to speak. They may be afraid of saying something that makes the situation worse. In these cases, it can be helpful for each person to take some time to cool off before getting together to discuss the issue calmly. Try to avoid escalating the situation or provoking the person who is silent into speaking. This can create more conflict. Trying the above steps can help those in an otherwise healthy relationship.

However, people in abusive relationships will need to take different steps. If a person feels that they or their family are in immediate danger, they must call If they are not in immediate danger, a person who believes that their partner is abusive should consider whether or not they wish to stay in the relationship. Couples who have difficulty communicating effectively may benefit from counseling.

A therapist can help the partners express their feelings so that they can resolve conflicts in a healthy way. However, therapists and organizations including the National Domestic Violence Hotline do not recommend couples counseling for those in abusive relationships.

This is because domestic abuse is not a product of an unhealthy relationship. The issue lies only with the abusive person. In some cases, focusing on relationship issues in therapy may reinforce their abusive behaviors.

Using the silent treatment is an unproductive way of communicating within a relationship. It can sometimes be a form of self-protection, but at other times, it indicates emotional abuse. How can you build and maintain a healthy romantic relationship? We had, at the beginning of their families had very close relationships with all the grandchildren, making much effort to have a relationship with them.

They talk among themselves, set the rules in a bullying manner, then the silent treatment. He dropped out of life and became a drug addict and speaks to no one.

Through the years they have helped a little here and there not because I asked but because they love my daughter, also his daughter.

I have learned over the years that I was straddled with the blame for his behavior. Our children understandably have emotional issues to deal with which are magnified now by age and have been since reaching adolescence.

I never was a controlling or mean person, since I grew up with a handicapped sibling and grew up understanding that situations were not under my control at all and I learned acceptance at a young age.

Yet, I have been told by the family that my children must have learned their, at moments, very erratic behavior from me. It is not easy being a single mother. I have no one except my handicapped brother. Once in a while I forget the rules they have laid out and I will mention an encounter that might be bad or good news about him and it soon becomes apparent that I am now under the silent treatment.

Both his sister and her husband and his mother will cut off all communication, even for news about my children or any small talk I text trying to see if they really are doing it again, until whatever it is that makes them decide they will communicate with me again. They are a very religious and very wealthy family and carry themselves in an impeccable manner at all times. It is very obvious when I have disappointed them.

My mother is giving me the silent treatment yet again. She has used against my father and now me, for years. He died in This morning, my mother asked her if it was ok to let HER dog out! A few minutes later, my mother let the dog back in! I was married for 9 years to a severe emotional abuser, an emotional sadist. He would give me a week or two of silence.

I have sought therapy for other issues, but not for this. Thank you for suggesting it. My mother needs it, but the only one that I can help is myself. I was disappointed, a bit hurt, shocked, and surprised.

We currently live over 1, miles away from each other, but that was going to change within the next few years. I thoroughly thought through what I wanted to say; made sure that I wanted to say it. I have been in love with this man since I was a teenager. He has never had a really long-term serious relationship or been married. We are both missing out here in my opinion, but I also have to move on with my life.

Thank you for this article — very helpful. He is not missing out on anything. If he thought he was, he would go and be with you. People, especially men do not stay away from what they like. He is not thinking or feeling the way he did two years ago. It also sounds like he would just like to sleep with you, go out to dinner a few times. Nothing serious. You should get serious about your life. Pining away for someone since you were a teenager?

You are believing in a fairytale romance with no problems. Hint: they tell you upfront and blunt. In a loving relationship there is no room for The Silent Treatment…we all agree. Thank you so much for this page. Narcissist also describes him perfectly too. What about when you have a 6kod blended family and moving in together was the trigger for the silent treatment to start. You are also saying to him "it does not matter what you do, I will be here no matter how abusive you are.

Obviously this is a breakup. My husband has used the silent treatment as a weapon to hurt me and to control the narrative for our entire relationship of 30 years.

He is narcissistic, sanctimonious and a hypocrite. Do as I say, not as I do is what he is like. Whenever I do something to annoy him or even have a differing opinion, he gives me the silent treatment until I apologize.

I used to blame myself which played right into his hands. A couple of years ago, my teenage daughter asked me why I put up with it and made me realize it is a form of manipulation and emotional abuse that I am not responsible for. That realization has set me free in so many ways.

He has been giving me the silent treatment for 2. I have carried on as normal, going about my business not being nasty or unfriendly.

Its also my way of showing them that they have really hurt me I dont care if they choose to ignore me back. If the person continues, I distance myself from them to avoid getting hurt again.